I was just wondering... Part 2

After my last blog entry I received this in my email, thought I'd share

Can you cry under water?

How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered?

Why do you have to "put your two cents in".. but it's only a "penny for your thoughts"? Where's that extra penny going to?

Once you're in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the clothes you were buried in for eternity?

Why does a round pizza come in a square box?

What disease did cured ham actually have?

How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?

Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up like every two hours?

If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?

Why are you IN a movie, but you're ON TV?

Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?

Why do doctors leave the room while you change? They're going to see you naked anyway.

Why is "bra" singular and "panties" plural?

Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?

If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a stupid song about him?

Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane ?

If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of a coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?

Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs!

If Wile E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that ACME crap, why didn't he just buy dinner?

If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, what is baby oil made from?

If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?

Do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?

Why did you just try singing the two songs above?

Why do they call it an asteroid when it's outside the hemisphere, but call it a hemorrhoid when it's in your butt?

Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him for a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?

I was just wondering....

Do dogfish bark? Why doesn't anyone ever say goodbye on tv when talking on the phone? When is Global Warming going to reach Michigan...It's freakin' cold here. Does Dennis Kucinich wear lifts? Do people really care what you think? Is raising taxes on cigarettes discrimination towards people who smoke? If Barack Obama becomes president and has Hillary as VP, should he fear for his life? If someone knocks the wind out of you, can you still fart? Is it a long walk on a short pier for an ant? Do crickets play cricket? Are elephants afraid of Michael Jackson? Are ghosts afraid of each other? Is Ann Coulter really going to vote for Hillary? In an alternative universe, dog backwards would be god, would we be worshiping our pets? If John McCain shaved his head, would he look like Casper or Elmer Fudd? Why do people say "To look like a man, you have to have short hair"? Does that mean Jesus and or Moses looked like a girl? When was the last time Hillary Clinton or Nancy Pelosi got some? If you break a crumb in half and eat one of the pieces, is it a half of a crunb or just a crumb that's left? I just heard the Safety Dance on the radio. Has this song/dance ever really kept anyone safe? If you fall in the woods, will a tree hear you? If you catch a falling star and put it in your pocket, will your shirt catch on fire? If the air was made up of helium instead of oxygen, would Alvin and the chipmunks sound normal? They say everything comes in 3's, what do 3's come in? If your nose runs and your feet smell, are you built backwards?

Favorite Quote of the week, Norm MacDonald..."I went to gamblers anonymous the other day...what a bunch of losers"

A little about the band

I seem to have run out of things to blog about at the moment. Well, I haven't really, but, the powers that be here would be bleeping me and eventually ban me from the blogging world. So in lieu of some past experiences of being in a new, young rock band touring America, I've decided to talk a little about the new band I'm in now. The new band is Jamboozle and we're basically out of Lansing MI, although I don't think anyone in the band actually lives in Lansing anymore. At least not full time. We've been talking about getting together for about 2 years and over the past couple months it actually fell into place. We're all seasoned musicians in our 40's, at least I think we are that old, maybe not. Anyway, on new years eve we were at a club called the Double Deuce and we're talking to the owner. We told him that we would eventually want to play his bar in a few months once we started practicing. (We still hadn't really started jamming on a regular basis because of all my surgeries). He told us that if we wanted to play his bar, that we would have to be ready by the end of January because he had a couple bands cancel. He said he was in a bind and would really really appreciate it. So we booked the show as a favor as it ended up being 2 weekends in a row instead of one. Basically we had 3 weeks to get ready and we still had to find a place to practice. Our guitar player found a trailer in the middle of nowhere, in a township of Onandaga, to rent and we had a place to practice after a week. Well we crammed, practicing 4 to 5 nights a week and managed to come up with about 42 songs to do the shows. The 1st weekend we played actually went pretty well. Suprisingly enough, there weren't any train wrecks on stage and everyone seemed happy. The second weekend only got better. We were much tighter and you could definately see improvement in everything we played. It was a good feeling. The crowd liked us, the bar owner was happy and we could look at each other and be proud. I was definately impressed at how fast we pulled together and sounded like we'd been playing together a long time. Our only major concern was if our singer, Kevin, could sustain through the weekend. We choose songs that would be the least stressful on his voice. He rose to the occasion and sounded great. Everyone did. It was a lot of fun. That, to me, is what it's all about anymore. No one is trying to be rock stars. We're just a group of talented musicians, at least the rest of the band is, playing the music we like and having fun. No primadonnas or egos flying around. Just having fun. That's the way it should be. I remember back in the 80's when attitudes and such played a big role in bands and it always bothered me. Of course, I was never one to take things too seriously and let those with attitudes just kind of fade away. Sure it's fun making money playing music and it would be nice to make a living off it like I did in the 80's, but that's not as important as having a good time and enjoying myself is. Realisticly, it's not as likely anymore either. But you know, when the audience sees you having a good time, they usually follow suit. I think that's the key to all you musicians that happen to stumble onto this blog. Show the audience that you love what you're doing, show them you're having fun and don't let egos and attitudes get in the way of your performance. In a lot of the bands I've been in in the past, I always seemed to be the counselor or whatever. I always tried to keep the peace, at least until we got through the gigs. Glad we're all grown up in this band and I don't have to worry about stuff like that. As you know, the show must go on. You may as well enjoy it. nuff said

Gimme a break

I saw this article on how basketball gets overlooked for most of the season and I thought to myself, "STOP YOUR WHINING". Geez, they make millions of dollars each year, it seems to be just about the only sport they talk about here locally this time of year ( and I live in Red Wing country). They said in the article that the NHL has a whole country...Canada. Well I don't live in Canada. The NBA has a whole country, it's called the USA. I'm sorry, but I would gladly accept a measley $50 million over 4 years to be unnoticed. Problem is that they are not unnoticed. If they don't get their way on the court, they find ways to get in the news off the court. Plus don't forget the endorsements they get. I'm just tired of all the overpaid athletes whining about this or that when they should be grateful. I would gladly put on some tennis shoes and run back and forth on a wooden court for an hour or 2 for a tenth, even a hundredth, of what they make. I would even make my tennis shoes extra squeaky if that would help. It just P's me off when local stations here give the bulk of their air time to Spartans and Pistons, and barely a mention of the league leading Red Wings, who by the way are on their way to a record breaking season. YAY!! Not that it's a major issue with me. Not, at least, until they started to whine about it.

The New Band

Hey all. The new band Jamboozle is up and running. Still have to pay some fees to get rid of those pesky banners. In due time my friends. Anyway, our debut at the Double Deuce went really well. No train wrecks on stage, had a good crowd and was also given return dates. Not too bad for only 3 weeks of serious practice. I guess it helps that we are all seasoned musicians. You can check some of the photos on the website, I'll have more on there in the next couple days. Well, since nothing funny or disasterous happened, I guess I'll keep this short. Felt bad the Patriots lost but honestly, I didn't really care anyway. Hopefully the Lions will at least make it to the Superbowl in my lifetime. Thank God I still have my Red Wings.
Peace out